"A Quarter of Nodes Please"

I visited a dimly remembered sweet shop that existed in Burghmuir Road in the fifties. It was at the furthest point of my safety zone. The shelves were full of sweet jars and tins of biscuits. Quantities were ladled into paper bags at your request.
I stood wondering what choice to make.
This choice would effect the direction of my life for years to come, which probably meant forever.
With pardonable hesitation I pointed at a jar.
The choice has been made. .

Hailstorm Cafe

Went to a cafe for a meal with another man. I was jealous that he had a new spoon and mine was an old spoon that had probably been used by thousands of other diners. We went outside to sit, him up a hill under a tall tree and me a few hundred yards away under another tall tree. A hailstorm then broke out. Isolated from each other we consumed our meals, me with an old spoon and him with a new spoon.
So, this is what it's like to eat out with another man?
Don't think I am homophobic, but, I mean . .

The Revolving Field

Walking alongside a ploughed field. Felt wonderful just to be alive. I was paying careful attention to the side of the field, watching stones, earth, plants as they passed me by. A round sphere of grass approached jumping around. Thought a rat must be inside but no, it was a kitten. Then I realised that I was standing still and the ploughed field was slowly revolving past me, like a carousel, a massive power being involved.
I then acknowledged that I knew nothing of how the world worked.
Even awake I still wonder . .

Scary Dream

Walking through my house last night, aware of being followed. Turned round to face whoever it was, slowly reversing. Remembered never to walk backwards in a haunted house, as something horrid is always behind you. Watching scary movies has paid off. Turned round and started to run, aware that the house is full of unseen people, watching. Not many places to run to in the house without ending in a cul de sac. Must make more doors.
Who am I kidding, find difficulty in changing the loo roll.
Why is real daylight so reassuring and ghosts reside only in the sleeping mind. Or do they?

The Auction

Running down a steep, grassy hill with my girlfriend. We were heading towards a car auction half way down the hill. It was a white Saab of around 1970 vintage. The car belonged to my aunt Alice, who died around 25 years ago. She was present and was also the auctioneer. Other relatives were all around. My girlfriend overshot the auction and stopped downhill, and slowly returned. The others asked who she was and I said her name was Alice. The auctioneer and my girlfriend seemed then to be the one person. The bidding was to start at £500. The car was worth several times this as it was in 'as new' condition. I thought I would put in the starting bid, which I did. I then realised that it was a fix, as they intended to give me the car for the £500, a real bargain.

Tea Break.

Sitting at the side of two small pools of water. I was a soldier with my rifle and about 5 of us were having a cup of Earl Grey. Heard a helicopter approach, a twin rotor affair. Landed alongside us and pilot jumped out and warned us about the old woman at the other side of the road.
She has cropped up before.
Thought about shooting her.
Perhaps not yet.

Heavy Rain Forecast

Not sure why I chose this picture today (my birthday). Perhaps its because its the last one from the archives. Painted it after my Dad died. He was always fond of steam engines.

Anyway, raining heavily this morning. Hope it clears up before the bbq on Saturday.

Life goes on until it doesn't.

The Journey

Decided to go out a ride on my bicycle. First I had to push the bicycle up a very steep, icy, snow covered hill. I met two other cyclists on their way up the hill. They warned me not to speak to the old woman at the top. She had a lot of legal, emotional and physical power. I wondered what they were talking about. Then I saw her, an old woman shuffling towards me. I recognised her, a woman from Dundee. I hoped she would pass, but no, she spotted me and called me across. She started to explain why everyone feared her. But she was merely the Gate Keeper, the Edge Figure guarding the boundary of another world.
Could I negotiate passed her to the Other Side?

Two visitors only

Myself and a friend were visiting a patient in the local hospital. I noticed The Editor and Isabelle had also entered and made their way to the far end of the ward. They were giving each patient a sweet and a kiss on the forehead. I thought, "So this is what they do to redress the balance." I said to my friend that she would get a chance to meet them both. I then lay with my head on the bed to receive the two proferred gifts. However I was rumbled before that memorable event occurred and I successfully woke myself up.

Another day at the office.

Coming home to 'Police Line, Do Not Cross' tape around an empty space where my house used to be. My wife however was still around to tell me that I would still have to keep on working to make up for the shortfall of having no house. I turned the car around and headed for London, saying that I would be back in around 4 hours, idly wondering where my house had gone.
Then I realised that I had no idea how far London was, had no wife, had no work in London to go to or even in what direction to head for London.
However I drove on hoping that things would be made clearer as the day progressed.
No change there then.

Quarry women

A visit to a disused marble quarry on a remote island at sunset. Heard a trundling noise and then saw an old unmanned tractor pulling a string of small stone filled trailers.

Two blonde women were sitting on the last trailer, laughing and legs dangling. They were incredibly beautiful but super scary in a Hammer House of Horror sort of way. I was sweating in case they caught my eye, but they passed on without incident.

Mmm, Doughnut House

I had just finished building myself a circular house in the shape of a half doughnut or perhaps torus is the right word. It was made of turf and glass and looked great. However I needed to roll the circular piece of ground flat in the centre so I decided to take the roller up the sides and over the roof. However I reasoned that the roller would fall through and wished I had built the house around the roller. How would I then retrieve the roller?
Trying to work out this small conundrum I awoke.

Red Dye

Walking through a dark garden, a dream path through sleep. At the end of the path lay morning, glowing dimly. Off the path were dark tunnels surrounded by foliage and rocks, entrances into dreams. These joined up to the main path later in the night. A red glow was visible on the ground ahead. I side stepped this and headed towards morning.
A midnight walk last night enabled me to stand in some red dye and see Jupiter, Venus and a brilliant satellite passing overhead.

A birthday wave

A friend came to my house to give me two birthday presents. The first was a breaking ocean wave around 3 m high, made of crystal clear water, which was continuously moving in the same place.

The second present was an old picture which was completely black, as was the frame. The picture was for telling the future, the idea being that by staring at it images appeared. I looked at it and immediately recognised it as something I had painted myself a long long time ago. I asked my friend to look on the back of the picture and sure enough there was my signature.

Excellent presents both.

The Stripper

I walked into my house where a plasterer was at work. He asked who had done the previous wall repairs, since the walls had many layers of plaster, paint and wall paper on them. He told me that to achieve a good finish I would have to completely scrape the walls clear of all this stuff.
Have no idea how this corresponds to my current process.....

The Hole

In this dream I was walking along a terrace between two steeply inclined ploughed fields. I came to a bench that had four friends sitting on it. Above them was a huge mound of new earth. I looked beyond that and saw that an enormous hole or tunnel had opened up in the earth. All of the earth had come out but stopped short of my friends on the bench. The hole had an extremely strange and frightening atmosphere, reminiscent of Carsaig, Isle of Mull.
This entry made at one of the numerous internet cafes on Isle of Iona.

Affair of the Heart

Not quite a dream but a glimpse out of the jaws of death. It was the occasion of my cardiac arrest brought on by another relationship crisis, poor diet and other not quite random factors.

The day started with more than my usual amount of lethargy, pins and needles and an unwillingness to face that all was not well. Persuaded by son to phone the doctor who declined to attend but sent an ambulance instead. A wired up wait in a hospital bed with doctor and male nurse staring at me expectantly. With good reason it turned out as I suddenly felt dreadful, tried to get out of bed and fell onto the floor.

Dead for over two minutes before revival, a modest amount compared to those in 'Flatliners'.

Non survivable if outside the Cardiac Care Unit I was later informed.

Anyway, no tunnel of light, angelic choir or fiery pit. Non existence instead, impossible to describe but only known about as I climbed out of it into the above picture. Like I had never existed. Then a sudden rush of awareness like a gale entering the back of my head with all my memories and programming, a total re boot. Born again into the world which was spinning around with fragments of doctors, nurses and shiny equipment. They slowly came together and a female voice said "He's back!"

If I felt ill before, I now felt ten times worse, with a two hour adventure into extreme pain coming up as they tried to insert a pacing wire down my neck into my heart.

I slowly felt really grateful to the hospital staff, the NHS and a host of machinery.

I had been given another chance.

However my relationship woes were not yet over, but that's another story. . .

But I have cut down on the lard sandwiches.

All I have to do now is make the most of being alive, jings.